"You and I both know we love helicopters ‘cause they’re the number 1 tool for scrambling this place into submission."

FOR SALE:

Fully equipped UH-60L Black Hawk. Combat ready, 11 person assault/transport unit actually holds a larger payload outside the craft than inside. This state-of-the-art TU will handle a threshold of 11 tons with a cruising speed of over 150kt. But its most eye-opening feature is the weaponry. Two 7.63mm machine guns at each opening allow for constant coverage in hostile transfer procedures. All critical components and systems are armored or redundant, and its airframe is designed to progressively crush on impact to protect the crew and passengers.

This unit has one job: to safely attack and rescue personnel from the reaches of enemy fire, and if that’s not the reason to have firepower at your side, then who knows what freaking is. Because they don’t call it war for nothing. Maybe the only better name would be hell, but recruitin’ is hard enough. It’s a nasty place and you gotta keep your ass covered 24/7 or your gonna end up in a box sent home where your Mama is bawling.

And don’t waste time on the shit about coming here to save something or protect anybody, because that’s a load. Nothing but a sales brochure. You and I both know we love helicopters ‘cause they’re the number 1 tool for scrambling this place into submission. These people. We’ll be building them brand new schools and hospitals in 10 years anyway, right? Just remember what they told us at Ben Tre, “You got to destroy a village to save it.”

And that’s the reason you learn to love your gun, feelin’ smooth and warm cradled in your arm. Destroy so we can build. Attack first, rescue later. Well I don’t care about the rescuing, I just wanna attack something, and fast. And I know you do too. That’s why you need a Black Hawk. That’s why you need a machine that can reposition a 105mm Howitzer, its crew of six, and hoist 30 rounds of ammunition in a single lift.

Low mileage. New floor mats.

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